Whether you believe in making New Year’s resolutions or not, this is a good time to reflect on how things are going for you and to commit to making some changes or renewing some goals that require more time or a different strategy. This year as I was contemplating all this, I was also reading and discussing Mark Nepo’s book, The Endless Practice: Becoming who You Were Born to Be. My readers and I found his recommended six practices powerful guides for 2018, so I wanted to share one that spoke to me as someone who is retired and aging consciously.
Just in case there’s any discomfort around the term “practice” as you’re thinking of the hours you spent in front of a piano or hitting 100 golf balls, here are some of Nepo’s thoughts on why we “practice.” “In actuality, living is an endless practice, through which we become who we were born to be, step-by-step, face-to-face, heart-to-heart.” He sees our practice as the paths through which life reaches us- the way we become more alive. “No matter how hard we work, the aim and purpose of practice is not to be done with it, but to immerse ourselves.”
The practice I found important for the New Year is “planting the oar”, or the process of Exploration, Mastery, and Abandonment. This is a practice that we follow throughout our lives as we explore a new interest or career, become accomplished at it, and then, at some point, take what we have learned and move on to a new area where we can stretch and begin again. This happened to me several years after retirement when I was introduced to life coaching, which I explored, studied, and mastered as my second career.
Nepo’s “planting the oar” term comes from a story about Odysseus, who had retired to Ithaca after twenty years of life as a seaman and warrior but became restless and bored. He left his wife a note and set off for the sea with his belongings and an oar. Along the way the soothsayer Tiresias stopped him and said, “No. Your time as a master seaman is over. You will turn around and walk inland, as far as you can, until you meet someone who doesn’t even know what an oar is. And then, you will plant the oar and start a garden.” Tiresias knew that Odysseus was heading back to the sea because that’s where he felt comfortable and respected. But he also knew that this was not where Odysseus would be challenged to continue growing and learning.
This life-long practice encourages us to find some new area to explore and then master, some new place to “plant the oar.” To make room for growth in a new area, we must let go of our focus on what we have already mastered. Though Nepo calls this “abandonment”, I prefer the term “repacking” because some of the already mastered skills and experience may serve us well in our new endeavor. We want to keep those in our toolbox as we move on.
“PIanting the oar” doesn’t have to involve taking on a whole new career. It could be learning a new app on the computer or renewing or cultivating a relationship. Maybe this is the year when you’ll take up a new creative outlet. It’s the daring to practice new things that keeps you engaged with life.
Whatever you decide to explore and master this year, I wish you success as you live life to the fullest.