A friend recently gifted me with a copy of the book I’ve Decided to Live 120 Years-The Ancient Secret to Longevity, Vitality, and Life Transformation by South Korean author, Ilchi Lee. Intrigued by the title, I read it on a recent plane trip.
I have never asked or answered the question –“How long have you decided to live?” -in my years of study and facilitation of conscious aging workshops. I wondered why since I encourage creating a vision for how you choose to be as you age. How long you’ll “be” is certainly part of the plan. As I read and thought more about this question and its implications, I became excited about challenging myself and others to answer it for themselves.
If you’re feeling a bit of resistance to coming up with a specific age you’ve decided to live to, you’re not alone. It may be a carry over from the “old” retirement and aging days when the average life expectancy was barely 60 and people saw old age as a time to just rest, maybe travel a bit, build up a little inheritance, and then get sick and die. Now that those of us in developed countries are living longer, more active and healthy lives, we could be in this part of our lives for 20 or 30 years or more. Making a plan for this time seems more important. We may also be uncomfortable deciding on the age of our demise because we live in a culture where death is not a popular topic. Many of us feel that if we don’t discuss death, it won’t happen.
Lee, in fact, ran into quite a few negative reactions when he announced his choice to live to 120. Some considered this an impossible dream; others thought that living that long would be “hell”; and a third group questioned his belief that he could choose his own age to die. “We should just enjoy the years of life given to us before we die. (25)”
Assuming that you are open to changing your mindset around your lifespan from a passive acceptance of the years “given you” to an active choice of the lifespan you want and will plan for, how will you make this decision? Lee based his choice on the maximum number of years current scientific studies believe we can live, his desire to be of service to the world, and his dream of completing his Earth Village Project in New Zealand. Travelers might have a list of have-to-see places to explore. I can relate to grandparents who want to live long enough to see their grandchildren grow into adulthood and maybe even have their own children. Writers may want to complete a novel or their memoir. Whatever age you choose, it should be based on a purpose or goal you want to complete during these years, or you won’t be as motivated to live to that age.
Now that you have a lifespan in mind, calculate the number of years you have left, possibly a quarter, a third, or more of your whole life! Lee suggests asking yourself the following questions:
- Do I have a [clear] goal and design for the time I have left?
- What will living to the age I’ve chosen look like?
- What do I want to achieve and who will I become during that time?
As Lee discovered, and you may already be feeling as you read these questions, seeing your life from this broader perspective leads to some significant shifts. Your current values and priorities may either become clearer or change entirely. If your goal is to live 25 or 30 years more, how you manage your health becomes much more important. That exercise program you were going to begin some time this year may need to start tomorrow and maybe be a little more intense. Lee also describes the “powerful shock to [my] brain. Now my brain is passionately searching my existing habits of thought and behavior for anything I need to change…so that I can live a good 120-year life. (24)” He guides the reader through many other changes, both external and internal, included in a vital, conscious, and self- determined aging process.
Now in my 75th year, I’ve decided to live to 100! You all are my witnesses, and I have to admit that this is a little scary. I’m going to have to give up that sugar sooner rather than later and go deeper into my spiritual practices, just to name a few shifts. My commitment to making a difference through retirement coaching, conscious aging facilitation, and other service projects just expanded. I challenge you to join me in answering the question – “How long have you decided to live?”